It's hard to believe that it's only been a week since I packed up all my worldly possessions and moved across the country. Are you allowed to grow as a person in such a short period of time? I feel at peace. Without the crutch of comfort and familiarity, I have been forced to do things by myself on many occasions and it's been good. Have you ever thrown yourself head first into a situation without knowing the outcome but knowing (hoping) that God will catch you? That is the best way I can describe my experience so far in the Lone Star state. C is wonderful to me, as always. He is kind and patient with my many breakdowns. Believe me, there have been plenty. Few nights ago, I was pouring myself a glass of milk before bed and the tears just kept on rolling down my cheek. It's like I'm going through some big emotional detox that I never thought I needed. Those first couple days, tears came from joy, frustration, burnt suppers, overwhelming clutter, homesickness and sometimes loneliness. He nursed and nursed and nursed and nursed my heart filling those tiny holes of family and best friends with promises of new adventures.
So here I am, sitting in my still cluttered, full of boxes apartment because C had some army business to tend to tonight, completely at peace with this. If you know me, you know that I tend to make a lot of "leap of faith" decisions. Not in a reckless way but in a "this will be really hard but it's something I need to do to grow" way. We have these wonderful neighbors. Especially two older couples. They say things to me like, "You look just beautiful hon, go out in the town" with suave cowboy hats and massive belt buckles. And remind me that southern hospitality calls for C to treat me to dinner when I have "such a pretty sundress on." I'm sure that when people told me that everything was bigger in Texas, it included peoples hearts.
I know there are still many more hurdles to overcome before Texas is "home" but ending this week on a good note is something I cannot cloud.
